REALLY?

merch?


I’m not a Hard Rock Cafe. I’m just some guy with a big head. I don’t have any merch to sell.

But if you’re looking to spend some money, maybe throw a few dollars toward the Greater Chicago Food Depository. They do great work!

WHY WOULD I HAVE MERCH?

〰️

WHO WOULD EVEN BUY SUCH A THING?

〰️

YOU HAVE ENOUGH T-SHIRTS AND TOTES.

〰️

Stop reading this and donate, or call your mom. She misses you and would love to talk about that weird mole on her back.

〰️

WHY WOULD I HAVE MERCH? 〰️ WHO WOULD EVEN BUY SUCH A THING? 〰️ YOU HAVE ENOUGH T-SHIRTS AND TOTES. 〰️ Stop reading this and donate, or call your mom. She misses you and would love to talk about that weird mole on her back. 〰️

REALLY!?!